People of Pittsburgh, audience of The Hard Rock Cafe show that took place on Friday, October 6th, 2006... we ask you to join us in helping solve the mysterious events that resulted in a destroyed piano bench owned by lead singer of local rock band "School of Athens". The photograph you see above is the last known picture taken of the in-tact bench. You will notice the bench is at a perfect horizontal level allowing Mr. Fogle to strike the piano keys at an even and non-arthritic motion. Tragically between the opening song "Kids with Guns" and the final song "The Manuscript" the piano bench (pictured) was horribly bent to a near 45 degree angle prohibiting Mr. Fogle from correctly sitting on the bench. Witnesses claim seeing a man wearing a yellow shirt with a bird print, holding a Gibson Les Paul guitar dancing violently across the stage. At one point the guitarist (later identified as Mr. Rosenblat) was seen jumping close to Mr. Fogle and even seen having a foot "or more on the piano thing" as described by audience member Federica Meier of Germany. Ms. Meier could not be located for comment.Conspiracy theorists and bloggers have already cluttered the Internet with scenarios pointing the blame not only at guitarist Neal Rosenblat, but other persons of interest. Some of these people were not even in attendance. Outlandish and improbable, popular figures from present day and past have been named. Included are "Cee-Lo", "The lady who hit Ben Roethlisberger" and "The Flying Spaghetti Monster". If you have any information, please leave comments below.
Donations are now being accepted for a new piano bench.
2 comments:
Hallo Dear Americans, here is the Dad of Federica Maier (Maier with an´a´)
For us Òld Europeans it`s very interesting, what can happen in America.
Take care of You...
Best Wishes from Rottenburg, South - Germany
Tobias
I've been watching CNN this week and I recall hearing a report about North Korea's Leader, Kim Jong-Il, announcing that North Korea has been testing nuclear warheads. The tests have been carried out by detonating the warheads on piano benches. Korea's former head of defense technology, Majong Tsoup, had this to say "I couldn't take any more and had to resign. Those poor defenseless piano benches did not deserve what happened to them".
During a recent press conference, US President George W. Bush had the following to say "My fellow citizens, at this hour, brave administration and congressional forces are in the early stages of an all-out attack on North Korea, with the ultimate goal of bringing down the oppressive behavior of North Korea" Bush said. "Through bold and decisive action, we will liberate our grandparent's and our grandchildren's piano benches from the threats of the system established by Kim Jong-Il to provide and ensure a safe and secure future for all piano benches worldwide."
Just this might be the real conspiracy behind what happened to the piano bench... ~Crazy Nick
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